First you must understand the ego and how it effect your commutation with your spirit.
I know many times before books and spiritual teachers will tell you to simply get rid of the ego, I’m going to surprise you. I don’t want you to rid of the ego at all. I want you to understand it, the positive and the negative parts, then I want you to rid the negative parts and keep the positive .Nor do I mean Ego, as egotist, or pride boosting. It’s not at all what I mean. The ego can be self absorbed, I want you to drop that part and I want you to be come self aware. The ego does in fact help you, but only in some ways. The Ego can help with this as well. We are simply trying to switch the mode from Self absorbed, to self aware. The ego then becomes very much needed in your physical life.
The ego is designed to defend and protect you. It’s whole purpose to be sure you are safe from harm in every way mentally, physically, and emotionally. It’s the very thing that says to you don’t put your finger into a light socket, that will hurt you. It reminds you to drive in between the lines on the road because if you don’t you could hurt yourselves or worst you could hurt another person. The ego also is the very thing that warns you when danger maybe around. Let’s say someone attacks you from the back, your ego defends itself by fighting the attacker. Some people who have reacted in a way to defend themselves can’t believe they did it or how they did it. The ego was there to help protect you or maybe another person. The ego is quick to remind you that using a knife to be careful, because you might cut yourself, it the thing that says when you do cut yourself, Oh! That’s going hurt. The ego is the thing in the morning who tells you to shower and dress before going out the door. It reminds you, you need to eat.
The ego will remind you that if you stand out in the rain, you might catch a cold.
The last time you went to the bar, remember. It’s tell you how you should act and how you should talk. How you should dress yourself, and how you should act at events.
The ego reminds you of events and then says, You shouldn’t or should do that. Based on what it has learned or seen. It’s the very thing that reminds you of all of that might happen, if you have a choice that needs to be made. Weather the ego has had the experiences itself or seen it on the news the ego takes in every experiences it absorbs it like water does on a sponge in your kitchen and puts it away for further use when it feels you need it. It’s been storing every event every since the day you were born. Some of you are saying wow the ego really does help us, your right it does and it could be a amazing friend when you look at this way, however the ego could also cause you problems. The ego also reminds you of any experience that you have been/ or could be in that may cause you pain or hurt. Weather it’s physical, mental, or emotional.
The best way to truly understand the ego this way is .
E- Every experience
G- goes in and
O- out when you need it
Because of the this the ego doesn’t see the different between the mental, emotional or physical pain. It just identify pain as bad and tries to protect and defend it’s self and in turn it protects you. So when the ego feel threaten or under attack, it always reacts. Weather the attack is Mental, physical or emotional. It the very thing that causes your walls to up during a fight, and it’s the very same thing that tell you that someone is just trying to hurt you. The ego takes in every experience therefore, the ego could try to protect us to the point we don‘t do something out of fear because of something in our past.
For example, I knew a girl who was bullied during her childhood. For years after middle school she just felt no one would like her and she shouldn’t even try to make friends. She allowed this feel to control her into her adult life, always feeling like no one would like her. Every times she tried to make friends she had that feeling why should I bother, no one going to like me anyways and they just start laughing at me. That was her ego talking her out of it as it was only trying to defend her. In turn she listen and had very few friends because of it. One day someone said something to her at work. The conversion went like this.
Girl- I didn’t think she liked me at all.
Boss- Why won’t she you’re a very likeable person?
You see the girl had no idea that anyone could like her and her boss couldn’t understand why she would think no one would like her. It was because her ego had been in the way for years trying to protect her. Now, that new experiences had enter the ego made it feel all warm. The ego could have taken that event and turn itself around, But the ego didn’t have enough experiences of being likable it was still on the defense. So the girl continue believing she wasn’t likeable.
You see for that little girl, not everyone was going to bully her or be hateful to her, but her ego won’t take a chance of being hurt in that way again, so it was on the defense of everyone. Reminding her that pain from her younger years. Telling her that isn’t going to happen again and sure the boos is nice, but that just one in hundreds of people. Even when she argue with the ego about how maybe things have chanced, the ego was quick to be the lawyer and displaced all this evidence to proof it’s case and in turn the little girl believed it.
Understand anytime something happen and you try to argue with your self here, it’s like your in court. The ego will remind you of the times you have had the same thing happen, all the times you saw or read about something like it. It‘s a very good lawyer in that case. In turn it has more evidences then you do, it has more support in it’s case and in turn you often listen to the ego.
Just like that little girl we all walk around with our ego defending and protecting us that could leads us in our life. Every experiences that has hurt is locked away till something remembers the ego of it and it bring that event forward but in a different way. The ego could holds us back on events that could be very rewarding in our life out of fear something negative could happen. It is that part of the ego that we must work with in our lives to help us all live a more awarding and filling our purpose in the universe.
Our Ego wants us to merely survive in this world. Keeping us safe. It wants us to get through the day without getting hurt or harmed. So for some the ego is in over drive. It simply tells us well we can’t do that, we shouldn’t do this, no way that will ever happen. And we listen to it and follow it accordingly Why? Be cause the ego doesn’t want us to get hurt. To many of us this has never stood us wrong so we listen to it. The truth is, it’s not always true. And most people are living their entire lives on auto pilot mode because the ego seems to be doing all the work. You are just going with the flow. Your not even really there.
If we just took a chance we might just success at our goals. The ego is the reason you don’t ask that girl out, the reason your not applying for the promotion, it’s the reason your not going to that party cause no one will like you. It’s also could be the reason you fall into the wrong crowd and do something you knew deep down inside your shouldn’t. Because the Ego also wants you to be happy, it wants you to be excepted. That means if the ego feels that you will only be excepted in this crowd of misfits, it will put you with them, because it feels it the only place for you. Honestly when you think about it, We are all misfits in this life. There is only one of us and no two people are the same.
It’s also the reason so people get into jobs they really don’t want. The ego tells you, You have to do this or you won’t be expected, you have to miss vacation, if you don’t people will think you don’t care, If you work late, the ego tells you, you must or it won’t get done right. You shouldn’t talk to that person because something bad might happen,
The ego also causes us to judge other people.
For insisted, Picture a man wearing shorts, no shirt or shoes, with tattoos covering his whole body and add bull ring in his nose. What’s your first reaction to him? Some of you might think COOL! Because you may know someone like that, or have met someone like him. Some of you may thing Eeeew, because you don’t think that is proper. Others of you might feel fear.
You might think this man is uneducated and worthless in this world. The fact is, your All wrong! This Man I describe does exist, you seen him on TV or in movies or even in your neighborhood or at the store. You haven’t spoken to hi m, nor has your spirit told you anything about him. Would you feel free to walk up to him and speak with him, or would you stare? Maybe you would look down and walk pass him quickly. You have already Judge this person without speaking to him. Something in your Ego could say he bad. His ego might be saying the same thing about you. That’s right. You could walk up to him and after years of abuse and being judge he could walk pass you, or maybe you start off asking him wow I love that tattoo on your neck where did you get that? Maybe then he could start a conversion with you and you find he had 4 years of collage for business and marketing owns his own four tattoo parlor and he a walking billboard for his very successful business. He may have a kid in collage to be a doctor.
If you took the chance to talk to him, you may find whatever is in your ego that caused you to judge him will come to the surface and you could fit it, right then and there and that man become a teacher for you and your ego. You see the ego must have had something in the past said to it, to judge so quickly.
When you were a child your parents could have seen someone and said something like “Oh My God! Look what she wearing!” in disgust, In turn your ego took that as that’s bad, and now today you still judge a person by what they wear. Often time our judgment on other is by word of mouth. We are told we have to, we must, you have to…Etc. In turn all those events have been taken in my the ego and ready for you when needed.
Your friends that you choice to hang around with do this same thing, now remember this as you going through the rest of you life, listen to people and see what’s your immediate reaction after it happens?
For insisted my ego could be telling me not to write this, No one would never read, it won’t do anyone any good.. Why brother. I also know that my spirit and the universe has told me I had to write this, this is going to help so many people get in touch with what their spirits are saying not their egos. I choose to listen to my spirit not my ego, and I want to help you do the same thing.
First step is becoming aware when your ego is talking to you. Every time you feel like you can’t, or you shouldn’t, or you never. Identify it, ask your self why. There is something in the past that has made this come to the surface for you. Now is it a good defends or a bad defends? As I mention earlier, the ego does have good defending. As keeping you safe on the road or from physical harm. If it’s one of those defending moments, I suggest you follow it.
However I want you to identify when you ego is telling you can’t because of a past experiences that emotional pain. The only way to truly get into touch with your spirit, is to understand when your ego is talking to you, and more importantly, why?
For example, what happen in the past that causes the ego to Scream at you, NO, Don’t, you can’t. What experience in your past has cause that? Identify it. Personally I would recommend a journal for this, because even if you can’t explain right away going back to later might help. Just like that girl it could go way back into your childhood and be forgotten at this time. When you really think about it, it might come to you. Those moments when your ego shows signs of Jealous, envy, cant’s, never. Moments like that could really be triggered by past experiences and be holding you back with negativity, because the ego believes it protecting you and defending you, when really it could be stopping you, from something the universe and your very spirit wants for you. Just as my Ego could have stopped me from writing this book.
The ego is in control and in charge and for some of you, you truly really didn’t even know it. You have been living your life in auto pilot mode, letting the ego drive all this time. You not even aware where all the time has gone and who you really are anymore.
I want you to identify it, recognize the moments . Find out why it feels this way. Understand sometimes the answer won’t come to you at first, the ego has been taken information in ever since you were born. Some things may go back further then you might remember. It’s very important to just be able to know when the ego has kicked in and it’s important then to try and match it with a past memory or memories, understand why the ego is in defends or protective mode.
If you really want to make a go at look within the past few days, months there are plenty of your very own examples out there.
This is a great start of discover for you in the days, months and years to come. You will find your actually learning more about yourself this way and more aware of your very existences. Please don’t misunderstand the diffidence of self aware and being self absorbed. We are working on being self aware. Self absorbed is what the ego wants you to do. My goal for you is to become more self aware. So once you recognize a moment your ego is getting in the way, ask yourself why?
Why shouldn’t I ask that girl out?
Why shouldn’t I go on vacation?
Why am I not applying for that promotion?
Why do I feel I have to start late at the office again?
Why do I feel I shouldn’t talk to that person?
Why shouldn’t I write this book?
Write it down if possible, you will be able to go back to it later as I will be discussing ways to help remove that negatively in your mind and move forward, with more positive energy.